Fighting Stage 4 Leiomyosarcoma one day at a time

Hello Everyone,

Thank You for visiting, I initially started this blog to keep family and close friends updated on our journey to Houston Texas, to visit with Dr. Burzynski, a world renowned doctor, who specializes in cancer.

A year and a half ago, MB was diagnosed with stage 4 Uterine Leiomyosarcoma and given no more than a year to live.

MB is only 50, she hasn't seen any of her kids get married or have babies. She still has a thirst for life, three kids and a Husband who absolutely adores her. My sister is 23 and youngest brother only 17. We still need our Mama Bear. If you are, or were, blessed enough to have an MB like mine, who has always loved you unconditionally and supported you, you will know how we feel. Nothing can replace a mother's love. Nothing.

Because MB's cancer is very aggressive, we had no time to waste. The very same day the doctor told us to prepare for hospice, MB and I said, "Fu*k That!", Hospice is a dirty word at our house.We started applying to the Burzynski Clinic as soon as we got home from the doctors appointmet, after 3 days of collecting medical records and sending faxes we were finally accepted.We never took time to think, we just acted. No more than a week and half after we were told to go home and prepare for death, we were on a plane headed to Houston TX in search of life and a second chance. We've left California and our family during Thanksgiving.

Even though the treatment is crazy expensive and we are away from home during the holidays, this is still the best decision we ever made. Sometimes you have to bet big to win big!

We aren't the Kardashians, we are just the Vargas' and we are going through the "realest" hardest battle of our lives...This is our story....If you'd like to start reading from the very beginning click on November, on the lower right hand side of the page and the very first post is the "Adventure Begins"

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Protecting My Cubs...Please don't show up unnanounced

Ever since I began caring for MB I began to feel like the Mama Bear, not just to her, but to my siblings as well. Whenever I write, say or do anything it's not just for myself but for those less vocal around me.

In the two previous blogs I asked that people not only give our family space but that they call before they come. Once a visit was scheduled I asked that people please act as normal as possible. I don't ask these things because I feel a crazy need to control people, I ask these things to protect MB and my family. MB is not the only one worn out by visitors, My siblings and father are as well. I'm not trying to keep MB hostage, I just want her and my immediate family comfortable because it truly makes for a more happy and peaceful home.

There are still some people that feel that they are above these rules because they think, "Oh well I'm her Mom, or brother or sister in law or niece or nephew, I can show up whenever I want." My response to that is ughhh NO no you can't! Yes, MB is special to you but you still have to respect not just her wishes but Our wishes and our immediate family. My sister is pregnant, my dad works a full time job, we want our home to be a place where we can relax. It's frustrating to walk into your own house and see a "visitor" no matter who they are and have to talk to them. Small talk is exhausting! Please put yourself in our shoes for just on second and respect us and our wishes. Also, there are many things  that our immediate family need to discuss in private, logistical things, painful things and we need our privacy now more than ever!

Another excuse I hear a lot is, "well your Mom enjoys my company I can stay as long as I please." Again No! We as her caretakers are exhausted and are not in the mood for long visits. We sleep on the floor next to her to make sure she is ok during the night, we prepare all of her meals, we clean, we cook , we need our space to re-energize as well. I think if you all begin to look at the bigger picture you can understand where my family is coming from. If you still want to see me as an "evil control freak" than I guess that will have to be your problem.

I have blown up on some people and I apologize for that but if you know the rules and you feel like doing whatever you want anyway be prepared to get a mouthful from me because I not only speak for myself, I speak for my sister, dad, brother and everyone else who lives in this house and is exhausted. I would LOVE to thank the people that already text and call and arrange their visits in advance. That simple act is so helpful and makes things easier on MB and the entire family. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but it is. In a family as big as ours its imperative that people schedule visits!

From now on I ask that EVERYONE text me (408-416-1815)and ask me when a good time to come is. If I don't confirm the visit please don't be surprised if I'm rude when you arrive, tell you off, or not even let you in. That's it, i'm not playing anymore.Some who have known me a long time know of my explosive nature. Those who don't don't be surprised when you see it because I protect my family with the wrath of a Lioness protecting her cubs. MB and my family is just so tired. I hope none of you take this personally this is just how I protect and love my family. That's it. Also, there are many ways to show you care and make your presence known, write a letter, send some flowers, leave a VM you don't have to visit. Here is our address, 157 Venado Wy, SJ CA 95123. I hope this is clear and everyone gets it now.

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